Birthday Traditions (oh, and my daughers' pseudonyms)

Before I begin, let me introduce you to my daughters, Frannie and Maggie. If you're someone who knows me personally, this will likely confuse you a little, but I have enough strangers reading my blog now that I am following the lead of several other bloggers and assigning pseudonyms to my girls. The names do have some significance, but it would sort of spoil the point of the anonymity if I explained them.

It took me a while to decide exactly how I wanted to handle the name issue, but I am tired of saying "my oldest" and "my youngest"...especially when I know that gramatically, since there are only two of them, it should be "my older" and "my younger", which really don't flow. Okay, now that we have that out of the way...

Frannie will be four next month, so I've been thinking about her big day, and about birthday traditions in general. In our family, we have always done this really original thing where we get a cake, and put candles in it representing the number of years being celebrated, and then we light the candles, and sing a song... how long did I have you going for? I actually would love to start a cool new tradition with my girls -- preferably something that can take the emphasis off gifts -- so I'm hoping for some reader suggestions!

Growing up, choosing the meal (mom/my brother) or restaurant (dad/me) was always part of the birthday ritual. We have kept this up, except now with growing families restaurant meals are no longer a viable option.

As a child, one of my gifts would always be what I referred to as a "Birthday Girl" (but learned today that the proper name is "Enesco Growing Up Girl" - see photo). Actually, I think the first one I got was number 8 or 9, but then I decided I wanted to collect the rest, so I received them as random gifts. Kind of unusual for a 12 year old to ask Santa for a figurine of a 3 year old girl, but I wanted to complete the collection. Half my set is blonde and half brunette, which may have been a predictor of how I would spend my adult life. (Note: so far brunette is in the lead.)

Anyway, back to the Birthday Girls. Once Frannie was born, I put the baby figurine in her room, and each year, as she sleeps the night before her birthday, the next one goes in. After Maggie was born, I started moving the figurines over as she hit each age. I realize I could have just purchased her a set of her own, but oh well. I figure they can keep passing them along to the next generation of girls in the same way. (Is it weird that my kids haven't even started school yet, but I'm already really hoping that someday I'll be a Grandma?)

There are some neat birthday ideas  for different cultures at http://www.kidsparties.com/TraditionsInDifferentCountries.htm, but I'm pretty sure my two little Irish girls wouldn't be interested in adopting the tradition of being turned over and bumped on their head enough times to represent their age...plus one for good luck!

Frannie's celebration this year will be a simple affair: a grandparents/godparents dinner, which will include four cousins, and then one special outing and sleepover with her cousin/best friend. The cake will be Fancy Nancy (more on her in a future post) and the "loot bags" (which have taken on a life of their own at children's parties) consist of a hand-picked book from Scholastic and a box of Smarties.

I have a wonderful colleague who is the absolute queen of little girls' birthdays, and someday I will twist her arm to help me with a post on the topic, but I'd rather wait until after my daughers' special days pass. Too much pressure to live up to her example.

So, what do you do to celebrate your kids' birthdays? I'd love to hear your ideas!

Where Do You Stand on the Vaccine Debate?

So, earlier this month, the study which sparked the controversial vaccines-causing-autism debate was retracted. Will this affect your practice with your children? Have you always been confident in immunizations, or do you believe, despite scientific evidence, that they could cause autism?

Our current family doctor is the same one who delivered me, let's say "a number" of years ago. This gives you a clue as to his age and experience, and as you would expect, his pro-vaccine stance. Whenever it comes time for my daughters to have any sort of shots, I always check with my good friend, also a family doctor with young children of her own, to see what she's doing with her own flesh and blood. Armed with a recent education, the latest research, and an attachment to her own three living subjects, it's a pretty good second opinion as far as I'm concerned, and therefore my girls are completely up-to-date on their immunizations, including this year's H1N1 vaccine.

I feel slightly relieved by the retraction of this study, hoping it will guide some parents and researchers to a more fruitful path in terms of identifying the cause of autism. Perhaps, though, I am just another insensitive skeptic who has no idea what it would feel like to take your child for a routine immunization, and soon after have him withdraw, regress, and change forever. What conclusion would I make in that situation?

What are your thoughts? Do you get your children vaccinated? Does the retraction of this study do anything to change your mind about the MMR vaccine/autism link?

For more information on the recently retracted findings, go to The Wall Street Journal or CNN Health.

Amazing Crafts Site: DTLK-Kids

As a teacher and a parent, I love DLTK-Kids website. It's run by a Canadian mom, and offers more arts and crafts ideas than you could ever possibly use.

You can easily search by month, theme or holiday, and samples of finished products are shown, along with appropriate age levels. My favourite feature would have to be "Search By Material": perfect if you're wondering exactly what you can do with all of those baby food jars piled in the closet, or the collection of egg cartons you found in the art room.

In addition to crafts, you can find printables (math worksheets, bingo cards, writing paper, chore charts, doorknob hangers) and other activities (even ABC/123 stuff for preschoolers).

Though many faiths and cultures are represented on the site, there is a great collection of Bible crafts, printables and ready-made lessons, perfect for religious or Sunday schools.

DLTK also offers terrific birthday party ideas, complete with themes, cakes, banners and games (wouldn't little Dora lovers enjoy playing "Guess What's In Backpack!")

Another "must-bookmark" site to add to your favourites...right after This Mom Loves!

See It: New Rentals

Alternate Title: Guess What I Did All Weekend?

Here are three more DVDs to add to your rental list (please bear in mind that in general, I tend to disagree with movie critics, but I am judging films solely on their entertainment value).

The Stepfather (Dylan Walsh, Sela Ward): This one was better than I anticipated. I was annoyed when the trailers made it obvious that Walsh is a bad guy, but the movie makes that clear from the get-go. The suspense comes from waiting for his stepfamily to figure it out. Some sketchy plot details (I would have liked to see more about what made Walsh's character such a freak) and a few too many 'girlfriend-in-bikini-by-the-pool' shots for my liking, but otherwise a good watch. This is a remake of the 1987 original, and according to reviews, pales in comparison.

Are YOU a Hyper Parent?

Are you a "hyper parent"? Did you play classical music to your fetus? Have you competed for spots in prestigious preschool programs? Do you question your child's teacher over half marks on tests? Do birthday parties involve caterers and  lavish gifts? Have you already started writing your baby's university application?

If so, then perhaps you need to check out this documentary:  http://www.cbc.ca/documentaries/doczone/2010/hyperparents/index.html

Follow the link to a short article, accompanied by a 3-minute trailer and a complete 43-minute video: "Hyper Parents & Coddled Kids".

As an educator, I have certainly met some of these "hyper parents", but I can't say I agree with the article's statement: "Ask any teacher and they will tell you that the toughest aspect of their job is dealing with overbearing parents who fiercely intervene at the first sign of trouble." I have several pet peeves that would come in ahead of this one, and quite frankly, the practically non-existent parents concern me more than the overbearing ones.

Take The Challenge: Is Your Family Worth Five Minutes?

So, for us Catholics, Lent begins today, and we are encouraged to give up (or take on) something to help make us better people. Some stick to the old give-up-potato-chips standby (I mean, if Jesus ate nothing for 40 days, surely we can go without chips?) but now we are being encouraged to think a little more broadly about what we could perhaps start doing that would be more valuable (although let's be honest, no one will be hurt by the giving up of chips. Except maybe the Pringles company.)

I've been on a mission to find something meaningful to do this year...give up swearing again? Not really a big problem of mine, so might not be the most worthwhile option. Do volunteer work? When?

My problem was solved when I read Catherine Newman's great article on multitasking in the March issue of Ladies' Home Journal called "Life Is Good...Don't Miss It". Like many moms, I consider myself a multitasker, but the article posed some great questions about why we're devaluing our daily activities, and what exactly we're rushing ahead towards. The lightbulb went off, and my challenge for myself (and all of you) was born:

See It (Sometime): Valentine's Day

Although critics seem to disagree with me, I really enjoyed Valentine's Day - the movie. It was exactly what I expected: a fairly light romantic comedy which sticks pretty close to formula, and ends (spoiler alert!!) with almost everyone happily in love. Although predictable, there were a few twists here and there: one I saw coming a mile (or should I say a flight) away, but another which totally surprised me.

With over a dozen A-listers, you really can't go wrong if you just want to soak up the star power, but there are certainly no Oscar-worthy performances. The movie attempts to portray a broad range of demographics: from teens to seniors, first-daters to happily-marrieds, and different races, socioeconomic groups, and orientations, but it doesn't feel forced.

As with any rom com, there are no "gotta-see-it-on-the-big-screen" special effects, so unless you have a girls' night out in the near future, you can easily save it for a rental. It's definitely worth seeing though, and leaves you feeling hopeful about love.

Have you seen Valentine's Day? Please add your thoughts!

Good Deeds: Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep

A photographer from the GTA asked me to draw your attention to "Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep". NILMDTS is a charity which sends photographers out to families who have just had a baby who will never come home from the hospital, to create beautiful portraits that will hopefully help to aid in the healing process. To raise money for this cause, photographers across North America are taking pictures of families and entering them in a contest to find "North America's Cutest Family". There are some great prizes including the grand prize which is a car. Last year they raised over $165,000 and this year they are hoping to do much more. For those in the GTA interested in having your family photographed for the contest, check out Annya Miller Photography.